Men and women communicate differently, even when we put aside all traditional gender generalizations. If you want to make your girlfriend happy, you must learn to communicate in a way that makes her feel heard, understood, taken seriously, and valued. Learning to communicate better will not only ensure your happiness and satisfaction, but it will also improve the quality of your relationship.
What is communication?
Communication involves all interaction between you. It includes not only your words, but also your actions or non-actions and your non-verbal communication such as body language and tonality. People often think that the word is where all communication happens but that is not true, far from the truth in fact. Words contain the minority of 7% of communication; the rest is in body language with 55% and tonality with 38%. So next time you defend yourself with: ‘I didn’t say a word!’ you may want to rethink the rest of your message.
Ways to improve communication:
1. Listen: Communication involves listening carefully. This is also called “active listening,” which means that you actively follow what your partner is saying, rather than passively sitting down. Active listening means giving verbal encouragement such as ‘ah’ or ‘oh’ and ‘mh’, looking at your body towards the other person, nodding from time to time and maintaining appropriate eye contact.
2. Comments: Before you start adding your opinion, point of view, or proposing a solution, start by giving your partner feedback on what you’ve heard. Your girlfriend wants you to listen to her more often than to have a solution presented to you right away. You may have noticed that girls often talk to each other for hours, without necessarily offering any solutions. This is because the traditional female conversation style involves sharing experiences, emotions, and understanding. Offering solutions is the masculine style of interaction.
3. Honesty: Last but not least, be honest if you can’t give your girlfriend the attention she deserves right now. It is better to be honest if your head is full of other things than to pretend to be attentive; It will show itself and you will make yourself and your relationship a great displeasure, as she will doubt you in future situations. Be sure to suggest an alternate time and space for the conversation and, most importantly, follow up. Your girlfriend will appreciate your honesty and your commitment.
That’s where the statement ‘Actions speak louder than words’ materializes: Communicating better does not necessarily mean speaking better. Your presence (action) will be proof to her that you really want to be there for her.